in

it hurts.

it hurts.

it hurts.

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29 Comments
  1. I know that feeling. I asked a girl out at her workplace. So we started texting. After a few days I went to her workplace to ask her out again. She agreed but only as friends because she has a boyfriend

  2. Unrequited love sucks. I also feel for all these girls that think they have great friends, when what they have is guys who want to bang them.

  3. I have had guy friends ask me out once I started dating my now husband. We would play video games and hang out, always in groups, and I was always clear to all my guy friends that dating in high school wasn’t in my comfort zone. When I met my husband right before college, suddenly a few admitted they were only hanging out with me hoping I would change my mind and choose them. Then they got angry at me for not choosing one of them, as if becoming friends meant I HAD to date them, and how dare I “use them” all this time. I was clear about my intentions, I just wanted to me one of the guys and have somewhere safe and fun to be during school, I didn’t like how gossip-focused all the girls were. I liked them as people, but I don’t think they cared about me. They all collectively ignored/insulted me after that.

    Friends and marriage have different requirements and needs. Someone can be a good friend but a terrible partner, and these guys all had alot of self growth of their own to do before they could be part of any team with any girl, let alone what I was willing to take on. The fantasy bubble will always pop and then the hard work of maintaining a shared life with someone always comes into play. Everyone has to choose what they need, and what they can provide in turn. We all have our own right to choose who we feel fits the role. And in crushes we have to respect that choice, even if we desire a particular outcome, because no one is owed what they desire.

  4. Dude, I actually drived for 4 hours to say how i felt to a girl i really really liked. When I arrived there she said she was dating an old friend of mine (she said it to ne before i could tell her) at first it felt like something ws crushing my heart, but then i remembered that that old friend was a really good person and they had a lot in common and…suddenly…I felt happy for her, it never happened to me before and it was a surprise.

  5. Make a joke. The more she laughs, the narrower her eyes. The more attractive you look. Source: science

  6. This hits close to home because I have a friend who I’ve liked for a while now and they always tell me about things they like in people and what they would want in a partner

  7. When an unfortunate thing like that happens and you want to be with them. You should stay friends with that person. Not because you want to compete for their effection, but because you obviously like being with them enough to get this far.

    Dropping a friendship just because they are not intrested in you the same way is the worst thing to do, it sucks to loose a friend over that.

    Of course if you start feeling jealous and start hating yourself, then it would be right to end a frendship with someone. But that goes further a bit into the rabbithole and i sure am not qualified to help with it.

    I don’t know if that helped anyone but i’ll leave it here anyways. And maybe help at least one person out

  8. You aren’t doing yourself any favours staying around a girl you like but is going out on dates with other dude.

    Either confess your feelings or bail, you only playing yourself by sticking around.

    At least if you confess you’ll know at least for better or worse. If you just wait around while she goes on dates with other men then she’s going to find one and where are you going to be left?

    Value yourself higher King, you deserve better than that.

  9. Holy fuck i hate this victimization. This is literally your fault for not saying anything about it. Girls don’t magically know when you’re in to them.

  10. All I can say is if you are going to be her friend, be her friend without any underlying shit going on because it’s not fair to you or her. You get hurt and she gets blindsided and betrayed because you aren’t being genuine. Find someone who you can love and loves you back.

  11. Some advice, OP, if you’re talking to someone just because of the potential they may break up with their s/o and suddenly realize they have feelings for you, leave.

    If you’re friends with them and help them out even just partially so that they’ll notice you and an attraction will form, leave.

    If they’re someone you care for regardless of whether romance develops, then I wish you all the best. To either get what you want, or to move on.

  12. Don’t worry OP, been there too.

    Pain still didn’t fully go away after like 3 years, but it’s manageable

  13. I’ve spent most of my life like this with only one GF over 10 years ago after Highschool. It’s not worth your time dude. Work to improve yourself. I had a life changing experience right before the pandemic and realized I had been living with depression for most of my life. I’m not totally cured but I’m mostly over it. I ended up losing a ton of weight (75 pounds) , gaining confidence because of it (and have been practicing talking/flirting with girls since). My friend kept pushing me to try online again ( I had very few matches and no one ever wanted to meet me or go on a date) but I tried again and got several matches. I ended up dating a bit but stuck to online social platforms for relationships and I have been in a 5 month IRL relationship with an amazing girl who’s meeting my parents next week.
    Don’t let girls use you for attention. I’ve done that most of my life. Spread out on social platforms, get into online dating, if you’re not getting matches you need to work on photo skills , style or fitness.